Aqua's Diary

Dear Diary,

      I sat in class, alone in my isolated desk staring at nothing. I heard the other students in my class say that he got into a fight.

“Looks like the delinquent got into another knife fight,” one student says.

“He doesn’t even try to hide it,” another replies.

       “Looks like his dragon skin is penetrable,”

I looked at him from far away and stared at his sapphire blue hair. His name is Ryu, the oldest student in the senior class, being 20 years old. Along with his hair, he has serious, deep set, dark blue eyes. I like his eyes, they look so unique. I’ve never seen irises so small… I can see the white part of the eye under it in normal circumstances. It looks so cool~. I noticed his arm was bleeding and I couldn’t help but go over to him. He said that he’s okay but I disagreed and grabbed his hand and smiled at him as I lead him down to the nurse office.

      Now that I think about it, I was always afraid to show a smile. With everyone being so two faced and twisted, I’d be lowering my guard if I showed one. However, there was one person I smiled to.

      As I entered the nurse office to talk to the nurse, I didn’t notice I was still holding his hand and the nurse thought we were dating. Even when I told her we weren’t dating, I think she didn’t believe me…I don’t get it…How does holding hands make people think you’re dating someone? People can be really weird sometimes.

    I let go of his hand and let the nurse tend to his wound, while I waited in the waiting room.

    While I was in the office waiting for Ryu, I was afraid that she might’ve noticed the marks and stiches on my arm. You must be wondering how I got these injuries.

    Well it’s a long story, but I guess I can tell you. When I was young, my mother was very sick. Mother and father were married and were deeply in love. I remember those days when my mom felt better as if it was yesterday… We’d all go out to the park and have a picnic under a tree eating a whole bunch of sweets and drinking Blue Fire soda(my favorite~). I love those days so much… Sometimes I wish I can go back. But soon my mother got severely sick. She wasn’t able to get out of bed anymore and had to spend the rest of her days in the hospital until…she slipped away.

I remember that day so clearly… My father received a call from the hospital and they told him that she had died. On that day he started drinking until he got drunk, and nearly hit me in the head with the bottle; I decided to spend the rest of the day in my room crying over her death. My father soon became abusive and coldhearted, he didn’t hug me anymore or show me any love. Instead he cursed at me and hit me no matter if it was day or night. I remember he told me once that I’d eventually get used to it and that I won’t feel the pain of his blows.

On the day of my mother’s funeral, he told me he wasn’t going and told me to stay home, that I was forbidden to go to it. He drank till he passed out and once he was out cold; I snuck out of the house and ran to her funeral. When I saw her in her coffin, her skin white as snow, her body as still as a doll, I couldn’t help but cry. She was dead and I knew I would never hear her voice again. I would never hear that lullaby she sang to me before I went to sleep, and I would never see her again.

As the years went by I had no friends and the scars on me continued to build up, in fact, I stayed back a few times… I was so depressed that year that my grades weren’t good enough to pass… That’s why I’m 19 and still in high school. Any way that’s enough of the past let’s go back to present time.

   After the nurse finished healing Ryu’s wound, we headed back to class. The teacher said that we had to do a project on laughter and he paired us together as partners and told us to sit together. So I took my stuff and sat in the empty desk next to him. The class then started to whisper about us. I couldn’t make out what they said, but I know I heard the words “delinquent” and “slut” from their conversation.

    Then she decided to say something. And when I said “she” I mean Hime, also known as the most popular girl in the school, I guess she lives up to her name, which means princess. She really acts like she’s the princess of the school and expects everyone to do what she says. Ever since I stepped into this school, she spread rumors that I was a slut and soon the whole school believed what she said. Even the majority of the teachers believed her.

    Hime kept on asking me questions like “How much do you get paid slut?”  And etc. To my amazement, Ryu actually stood up for me and told her “She’s not a slut.” I guess he doesn’t believe the rumors. After school, she approached me again and was about to hit me, when Ryu caught her fist and told her to leave me alone. She reluctantly agreed and left. I thanked him, and I think maybe he didn't see me as a bother... Maybe…

After that we went to the library to do some research. I was trying to get a book but it was too high even when I was on my tippy toes. I lost my balance and fell on Ryu by mistake, I really hope I didn't hurt him -_-‘. Later on he left, I didn't say much to him but I really wanted him to stay a little longer, but I didn't understand why. I thought about it for a few minutes until I realized how he made me feel. From the time he stood up for me, he made me feel like a normal girl. I felt free from my past, free from anything bad, because he was in front of me, protecting me. I realized that I started to fall in love with him.

    Later on I left the library and went home. The house reeked with the smell of liquor and that’s when it happened, my father threw an empty liquor bottle at me but it missed and hit the wall. Unfortunately, one of the shards scraped my arm and gave it a deep cut, so I went to my room and stitched it up. Well its getting pretty late and I need to get some sleep so I’ll come back to talk to you tomorrow night.

Dear Diary,

     It was raining today. I was heading to school when Hime came up to me and forcefully took my jacket before running away. Without my jacket my scars and stitches were revealed, and all I did was look down and stay in my spot. What was I going to do if the teacher’s saw? And if I went home father would hit me. Suddenly, Ryu came with an umbrella over us and put his hand on my back and walked me to school. While we were walking I saw him take a quick glance at my arm.When we got to the school he took off his jacket, and I noticed a cut on his arm. I told him to go to the nurse but then he said,

    “I see your arm isn't fine but I don’t see you going to the nurse”

I didn't say a thing and looked down. He left with just saying, “Exactly.”

    His words were so harsh it felt like as if they were piecing my heart. I was about to cry so I decided to run out of the school. I ran all the way to the park and cried myself to sleep.  

    When I woke up, Ryu’s jacket was on me. He’s still being nice… I guess he was just looking out for me back there. I looked around but he was nowhere to be seen so I put his jacket in my book bag and headed home.

    Once I went inside my house my father hit me again and then he took a knife from the kitchen and stabbed my arm. It left a deep cut and I had no more thread to stitch it up so I took a cloth and wrapped it around the cut. Well talk to you tomorrow good night.

Dear Diary,

I was in class sitting next to Ryu, and my arm was still bleeding. He told me that I should go to the nurse but I just stayed quiet. I thought maybe he’d just stop if I didn't say anything. Suddenly he grabbed my wrist and dragged me to the nurse. The nurse asked me how I got cut and I told her that I fell on some shattered glass. I felt bad for lying to her, I really didn't want to lie to her but if I told her the truth, I was afraid of what might happened.

     Later on that day I gave Ryu his jacket back. I noticed that his mouth was twitching; I asked him if he was okay and he told that he was trying to hold back his smile. I wanted to see his smile so bad… So I started smiling and going closer and closer to him until his back was on the tree but then suddenly he ran off covering his mouth. I felt so bad for pressuring him to smile to the point he ran away. So I ran after him and told him I’ll stop. After that we started walking and he asked me how I got my cut, he told me he knew it wasn't from falling on shattered glass. I didn't know what to say so I said,

“Uh, I remembered I have to do something!”

I walked away, but then he grabbed my hand and told me to tell him. He seemed so concerned about me, and I didn't want to lie to him. So I told him the truth. Just thinking about that he was the first person I told the truth to... Ah it’s so embarrassing! What happened next was so sudden in fact I think I’m still surprised, even now. I’m also excited I don’t think I could stay still >_<. Anyway he told me that we could run away together from our abusive parents! And then I said

“Really?!”

And he was like

“Yeah!”   

“But where would we go?”

 “We can go to a motel I've been to. We can stay there until we can save more money to get an apartment. I’ll get myself a part time job as a bouncer.”

 “And I can get a job at the Maid Cafe!”

 “Exactly!”

     I accepted his offer and noticed he was smiling and I couldn't help but smile along with him. I told him that we should celebrate with some Blue Fire soda, and he grabbed my hand!!! Ryu took me to a store still smiling; bought got two sodas, then sat on a nearby bench. We both sat down smiling and drank the soda. I even learned that he likes Blue Fire soda too! We talked for a while and he called me strange, I like it when he calls me strange it’s like a compliment to me. He told me that he would wait for me outside my house tomorrow morning. When I went home, dad was passed out on the couch again. He probably drank too much. Anyway, I’ll tell you what happens tomorrow goodnight.